What did you want to be when you grew up? I didn’t dream of being a mama. I wanted to be a missionary. Raised on the stories of Jim Elliot, Adoniram Judson, and Amy Charmichael I dreamed of walking in the footsteps of giants. Sometimes in the ugly, hard moments of the last decade I’ve wondered if I made a mistake in getting married and having kids. Did I miss what God had in store for me?
But I don’t think that way anymore. That kind of thinking limits God’s amazing creativity and generosity. Even though I accidentally became a mama God is more gracious than I often give him credit for. The daily friction of sacrificial love that a marriage and raising children brings has shaped my heart. What I didn’t know I wanted has become a gift.
As the season of sleepless nights and diapers has faded away I’m learning that following God comes in all shapes and sizes. I hear people talk about God’s will as if it’s a set plan, but that doesn’t resonate with me. How many relationships do you know that follow a blueprint. God’s will is clear for his people, Micah 6:8 sums up what he wants from us succinctly, “to act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.
Within those parameters is a lot of room for variety and freedom. How do you go about living justly, loving mercy, and knowing and embracing your place with God?
I’m finding that God is amazingly kind in leading the hearts he created. I still dream of walking in the big footsteps of other worldly faith giants. A world in need of compassion consumes my imagination. And I only fall in love with Jesus more in realizing he gives me both. Marriage and motherhood, and missions. Of course it all looks different than I expected. But that’s part of the excitement (and occasional panic)!
What dreams have you put on the shelf that God may be calling you to dust off? He made your heart and he is a generous God. What looks like an opportunity missed may only be an opportunity postponed. Do you trust that God is kind as he leads you and understands your heart? If not consider praying that he expands your view of his nature!